The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Randomize
