...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
