He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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