she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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