this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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