That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Randomize