Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
