Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
