just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Randomize