You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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