Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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