ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
