For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize