i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
that is very illegal...i love you.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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