Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
