A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize