in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize