Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
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