I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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