this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
whose parrot is this?
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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