I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize