i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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