they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
