dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
