My liver just broke up with me...
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
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