I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
