remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
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