What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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