FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
