Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Are we still banned from the library?
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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