I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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