I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
