i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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