Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
