smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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