Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
you never un-have a 4some
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
