I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
