if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
this hospital has no fireball
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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