mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Randomize