She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
