he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
