It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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