Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
this will be a night to untag.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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