So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
