i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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