I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
