garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
