one might say we're banned from that church
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
