Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
