he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
